Psalms 33: ²² Let your unfailing love surround us, Lord, for our hope is in you alone.

 

some days the love of God is all encompassing.. I can feel it so strongly.. it is more overwhelming than the love of any human being...

that is a wonderful feeling..

 

some days I feel as though God has forgotten me completely.. like He no longer even knows my name...

that is a horrible feeling...

 

we can't always feel something... even in relationship with humans.. sometimes we feel they don't care.. but they still do.. even when they are somewhat distant... we are usually still sure they love us...

so why is it that when we can't 'feel' God, who is Spirit not flesh, we panic... or at least I do... I can live without the love of a human many times.. but not without the love of God for even minutes..

 

Father.. remember me again.. let me see your promises while I am still in the land of the living... let me feel your unfailing love surround me.. overwhelm me with your presence.. because my hope is in you alone...

Ephesians 3: 16 I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit.17 Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. 18 And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 19 May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. 20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.

I pray this for all of us... that we can continue to grow in Christ and become more like Him each day.. that we will become stronger and more trusting of Him.. that we will fulfill all that He has planned for our lives...

Isaiah 46: ³ “Listen to me, descendants of Jacob, all you who remain in Israel. I have cared for you since you were born. Yes, I carried you before you were born. ⁴ I will be your God throughout your lifetime— until your hair is white with age. I made you, and I will care for you. I will carry you along and save you.

 

I am thankful today that God will carry me throughout my life... that He is my creator and He loves me.. that He accepts me when I am right and when I am wrong too.. I am thankful that He will care for me and that He will save me.. and when I am too tired.. then He will carry me..

 

I love me some Jesus...

2 Kings 17: 37Be careful at all times to obey the decrees, regulations, instructions, and commands that he wrote for you. You must not worship other gods. 38Do not forget the covenant I made with you, and do not worship other gods. 39You must worship only the lord your God. He is the one who will rescue you from all your enemies.”

 40But the people would not listen and continued to follow their former practices. 41So while these new residents worshiped the lord, they also worshiped their idols. And to this day their descendants do the same.

I think of how many times the bible keeps telling us how important it is to not worship any other gods... in this chapter, the israelites (the northern kingdom) was taken over by assyria and removed from the land.. the king of assyria replaced them with people from many other places who only knew of other gods.. God sent lions to kill them because they were not worshiping Him... the king then sends the priests back to teach the people about the God of the land.. who is of course the only God there really is... 

I find it amazing... about me.. about you.. about everyone.. we always say that we don't worship other gods.. but when we put anything at all before God.. we are worshiping something else.. I can say I don't do it.. but we all do.. many times unintentionally... any time we are disobedient to what God wants we are putting whatever we are disobedient about before him... 

in my own life I know I have done it over and over about a man.. I can't even tell you the times that I have not done whatever God wanted in the hopes of pleasing a man... truthfully I would say I have done it over my children sometimes... and I have done it many many many times over money... which all of these things come down to wanting my desires over the will of God... 

I am thankful that while I am not always achieving it.. my desire now is for God's will above my own... as many people as God destroyed and deserted for putting something else above Him.. I am so thankful that He waited on me to get myself together and do things His way... His love is everlasting.. and I am thankful...

2 Kings 6: 8 When the king of Aram was at war with Israel, he would confer with his officers and say, “We will mobilize our forces at such and such a place.”

9 But immediately Elisha, the man of God, would warn the king of Israel, “Do not go near that place, for the Arameans are planning to mobilize their troops there.” 10 So the king of Israel would send word to the place indicated by the man of God. Time and again Elisha warned the king, so that he would be on the alert there.

11 The king of Aram became very upset over this. He called his officers together and demanded, “Which of you is the traitor? Who has been informing the king of Israel of my plans?” 12 “It’s not us, my lord the king,” one of the officers replied. “Elisha, the prophet in Israel, tells the king of Israel even the words you speak in the privacy of your bedroom!” 13 “Go and find out where he is,” the king commanded, “so I can send troops to seize him.” And the report came back: “Elisha is at Dothan.” 14 So one night the king of Aram sent a great army with many chariots and horses to surround the city.

15 When the servant of the man of God got up early the next morning and went outside, there were troops, horses, and chariots everywhere. “Oh, sir, what will we do now?” the young man cried to Elisha. 16 “Don’t be afraid!” Elisha told him. “For there are more on our side than on theirs!” 17 Then Elisha prayed, “O Lord, open his eyes and let him see!” The Lord opened the young man’s eyes, and when he looked up, he saw that the hillside around Elisha was filled with horses and chariots of fire. 18 As the Aramean army advanced toward him, Elisha prayed, “O Lord, please make them blind.” So the Lord struck them with blindness as Elisha had asked.

19 Then Elisha went out and told them, “You have come the wrong way! This isn’t the right city! Follow me, and I will take you to the man you are looking for.” And he led them to the city of Samaria. 20 As soon as they had entered Samaria, Elisha prayed, “O Lord, now open their eyes and let them see.” So the Lordopened their eyes, and they discovered that they were in the middle of Samaria. 21 When the king of Israel saw them, he shouted to Elisha, “My father, should I kill them? Should I kill them?” 22 “Of course not!” Elisha replied. “Do we kill prisoners of war? Give them food and drink and send them home again to their master.”

Elisha was an amazing prophet... he was able to speak and things happened.. 

what is it that made him so different from us? the bible tells us that Jesus said that we can do greater miracles than that which He did... yet we seem unable to even hold on to the smallest belief much less cause miracles... 

what would it take for us to become as Elisha.. or as Jesus has said we can be?

Psalms 44: 9 But now you have tossed us aside in dishonor. You no longer lead our armies to battle. 10 You make us retreat from our enemies and allow those who hate us to plunder our land. 11  You have butchered us like sheep and scattered us among the nations. 12  You sold your precious people for a pittance, making nothing on the sale. 13  You let our neighbors mock us. We are an object of scorn and derision to those around us. 14  You have made us the butt of their jokes; they shake their heads at us in scorn. 15  We can’t escape the constant humiliation; shame is written across our faces. 16 All we hear are the taunts of our mockers. All we see are our vengeful enemies. 

17 All this has happened though we have not forgotten you. We have not violated your covenant. 18  Our hearts have not deserted you. We have not strayed from your path. 19 Yet you have crushed us in the jackal’s desert home.  You have covered us with darkness and death. 20 If we had forgotten the name of our God or spread our hands in prayer to foreign gods, 21 God would surely have known it, for he knows the secrets of every heart.

I feel I have been in a "Job" experience for about 4 years now.. while I don't claim to be right all the time or perfect I do believe I am completely trying (operative word trying) to live in the will of God... and yet for whatever reason.. my relationship with God is more distant than even when I was in the world... 

so what this tells me is this... God will be close to us to win us over... and intermittently be close through trials or troubles.. but I think that He pulls away sometimes.. apparently for years on end.. in order to determine are we really serious about Him being first in our lives or is it only when things are as we want them to be.. but I would say that even in this long long period of distance.. I still know He has not left me.. He still prospers me and cares for me.. He protects me and loves me... I can feel these things... 

I am sure this is a building up of my faith but I easily say it has been a long and hard road.. I will be overjoyed with gratitude when He decides to end this period of testing..

I see that I am not alone in this struggle by the scripture.. this has been going on for thousands of years.. and so anyone else that is also going through it can know that this too will pass... because the bible promises that joy will come one morning.. maybe not this morning.. but one morning.. 

stand strong.. believe.. that is all we can do..