Psalms 5: ¹ O Lord, hear me as I pray; pay attention to my groaning. ² Listen to my cry for help, my King and my God, for I pray to no one but you. ³ Listen to my voice in the morning, Lord. Each morning I bring my requests to you and wait expectantly.

⁴ O God, you take no pleasure in wickedness; you cannot tolerate the sins of the wicked. ⁵ Therefore, the proud may not stand in your presence, for you hate all who do evil. ⁶ You will destroy those who tell lies. The Lord detests murderers and deceivers.

⁷ Because of your unfailing love, I can enter your house; I will worship at your Temple with deepest awe. ⁸ Lead me in the right path, O Lord, or my enemies will conquer me. Make your way plain for me to follow.
⁹ My enemies cannot speak a truthful word. Their deepest desire is to destroy others. Their talk is foul, like the stench from an open grave. Their tongues are filled with flattery. ¹⁰ O God, declare them guilty. Let them be caught in their own traps. Drive them away because of their many sins, for they have rebelled against you.

¹¹ But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing joyful praises forever. Spread your protection over them, that all who love your name may be filled with joy. ¹² For you bless the godly, O Lord; you surround them with your shield of love.

 

I am so thankful to be able to go to the house of God.. I cannot honestly imagine living without going to church.. it doesn't matter to me if it is time for church or not.. I just like to go there and sit with Him... to spend time with Him... being alone with Him... it is a great gift to me...

 

lead me in the right path Lord.. surely I will be lost if He does not make the way plain.. as I am always veering off in one direction or another....

 

I will sing His praises forever... I am so thankful for His protection.. for His joy... that He blesses us... and surrounds us with His sheild of Love... that is a great mind picture...

1 Peter 2: ⁷ Yes, you who trust him recognize the honor God has given him. But for those who reject him,“The stone that the builders rejected has now become the cornerstone.” ⁸ And, “He is the stone that makes people stumble, the rock that makes them fall.” They stumble because they do not obey God’s word, and so they meet the fate that was planned for them.
⁹ But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light.

¹⁰ “Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.” ¹¹ Dear friends, I warn you as “temporary residents and foreigners” to keep away from worldly desires that wage war against your very souls. ¹² Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world.

He is the stone that makes them stumble... because they do not obey God's word... and they meet the fate that was planned for them... that is hard for many people to accept.. that God has chosen you or He hasn't... most people like to imagine that everyone could be saved but they choose not to be.. many times in the word of God it states that we are chosen by God or we are not... while that is sad... and even scary... thankfully.. we have been chosen or we wouldn't be seeking Him out as we do..

I can't say how thankful I am that God has called me out of darkness and into the light.. that He considers us a holy nation and His own possession...

I can so relate to the idea that I once had no identity and now God has given me one... He has given me value and a purpose... He has given me worth... a reason to wake up in the morning.. He has given me Love...

I know we are temporary residents and foreigners.. I remember when I was going out all the time.. I felt like I belonged.. like that was where I loved to be.. if I were to go now I would feel lost and outcast... I would feel out of place.. because I don't belong to this world.. even though I am in it.. I belong to Christ.. and I belong in His world... many days I wish I were able to go there.. even just to vacation there.. but that is not the plan... so we struggle and strive to not become more and more like this world... to remain separate and holy... and it is difficult... we have to always remember that people are watching us and expecting honorable behavior from us... and that we are a representation of Christ here on earth...

Lord touch us and help us to live worthy of the calling you have placed upon our lives...

“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your Christian brothers and sisters all over the world are going through the same kind of suffering you are.” 1 Peter 5:8-9 NLT

hard to imagine that anyone is going through the same thing as we are... we can see one another's struggle and see that we really don't understand it sometimes because we are not in the same thing.. we have compassion and we pray for one another.. but we don't really think anyone else is going through the same thing...

surely the idea of our issues is to destroy us.. to get us to get up and walk away once and for all from God... to get us to doubt that He even exists.. that He loves us... that He even sees us... that we matter to Him...

stand firm against all that comes against you... keep strong in your belief that God is for you so who can be against you... believe that when the time is right.. He will rescue you and all will be good again...

Psalms 143: ⁸ Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you. ¹⁰ Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. May your gracious Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing.
 

this morning I was wrestling with God.. I wanted to sleep and He did not want me to... and I started praying... and I asked him... to keep me on the path that He has planned for me... I wonder how many times in a day that we fall off God's path... I wonder if we often mess our lives up and make everything take even longer to get righted by falling off the path....
 

where is this path?... I am unsure if I know where it is... I am unsure if I know that I am on it or not... but because so much of our lives and relationship with God is based on faith and trust... all I can do is keep walking and believe that if I am right.. or if I am wrong.. then He will reveal it to me...
 

it seems in the past.. when I was surely on the wrong path... I heard so clearly that I was doing the wrong thing and going the wrong way... I don't hear that too much anymore... so it makes you wonder if you are in the right place... maybe when we are in the right place God doesn't talk much because there isn't much to be said as you are doing the right thing....
 

lead me Father... I give myself to you... teach me to do your will you are my God... give me firm footing.. and let me know new every morning how much you love me.. show me how to reveal my love for you... transform me daily to look less like me and more like you.... amen.amen.amen.

John 7: After this, Jesus traveled around Galilee. He wanted to stay out of Judea, where the Jewish leaders were plotting his death. ² But soon it was time for the Jewish Festival of Shelters, ³ and Jesus’ brothers said to him, “Leave here and go to Judea, where your followers can see your miracles! ⁴ You can’t become famous if you hide like this! If you can do such wonderful things, show yourself to the world!” ⁵ For even his brothers didn’t believe in him.

this annoys me... because people just refuse to see good in someone... especially the people who are closest to you... I can understand being skeptical at first.. but really.. if you were raised in the same house as Jesus... surely you have seen him do some things that you can't do... so you should at least know he isn't quite regular....

and what made them imagine he wanted to be famous? why do people automatically assume that we are trying to get people's attention? most of the people I know would rather not have all the attention that comes with being gifted and annointed... all is does is cause drama...

but it is God's will.. and so we still have to be shown to the world as a light of God... all we can do is keep pushing and stay humble... don't allow pride and jealousy to overtake us...

Proverbs 5: ²¹ For the Lord sees clearly what a man does, examining every path he takes. ²² An evil man is held captive by his own sins; they are ropes that catch and hold him. ²³ He will die for lack of self-control; he will be lost because of his great foolishness.

God clearly sees what we are doing and the paths we are taking.. I wonder what it is about us that makes us imagine that God will conform to the ways we want to take rather than us conforming to His ways... and while I would like to say that I don't really do that... I have done it for a lifetime... and of course.. God never does conform to my ways... and in the name of Jesus.. I am learning to conform to His ways!!

we are all held captive by our sins.... thankfully we are willing to put them aside now more than we ever have been in the past.. I want to only be held captive by Christ....

we will die for lack of self control.. there it is again.... self control.. we will be lost because of this foolishness...

I have come such a long way by God's leading and grace.. yet I look somedays and realize I have such a long, long way to go...

Matthew 19: 4“Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’ 5 And he said, ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ 6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

7 “Then why did Moses say in the law that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away?” they asked.

8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended. 9 And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.”

strangely... this states if the WIFE is unfaithful.. not if the man is unfaithful.... (rude...)

moses permitted divorce as a concession to our hard hearts.. isn't that really the truth... we get tired of the mess.. decide we don't have to put up with this and walk away.... but it is so much bigger than just marriage.. don't we do this in every area of our lives..

I would say a hard heart is surely one of our biggest downfalls....

2 Samuel 6: Then David again gathered all the elite troops in Israel, 30,000 in all. ² He led them to Baalah of Judah to bring back the Ark of God, which bears the name of the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, who is enthroned between the cherubim. ³ They placed the Ark of God on a new cart and brought it from Abinadab’s house, which was on a hill. Uzzah and Ahio, Abinadab’s sons, were guiding the cart as it left the house, ⁴ carrying the Ark of God. Ahio walked in front of the Ark. ⁵ David and all the people of Israel were celebrating before the Lord, singing songs and playing all kinds of musical instruments—lyres, harps, tambourines, castanets, and cymbals.
⁶ But when they arrived at the threshing floor of Nacon, the oxen stumbled, and Uzzah reached out his hand and steadied the Ark of God. ⁷ Then the Lord’s anger was aroused against Uzzah, and God struck him dead because of this. So Uzzah died right there beside the Ark of God. ⁸ David was angry because the Lord’s anger had burst out against Uzzah. He named that place Perez-uzzah (which means “to burst out against Uzzah”), as it is still called today.

⁹ David was now afraid of the Lord, and he asked, “How can I ever bring the Ark of the Lord back into my care?” ¹⁰ So David decided not to move the Ark of the Lord into the City of David. Instead, he took it to the house of Obed-edom of Gath.

when david decided to move the ark.. which carried the presence of God... he did not bother to look in the law of moses and determine HOW God told them to move the ark.. so what they did was not done by God's laws... most of my life I have felt God was ridiculous in this.. I felt that david was trying to do a good thing and God went overboard by killing a man who was just trying to make sure that the ark didn't fall.... that is completely worldly thinking....

God's ways are not our ways... before Jesus died and tore the curtain that hung before the holy of holies.. there was very few people who had access to God personally... most everyone had to go through a priest... when the priest went into the holy of holies.. where God resides.. he had a rope tied around his waist because if he had sin in his life that was unconfessed then he would die in there and they had to be able to pull him out.. and they couldn't go in to get him or they would die too....

I felt God was telling me in this scripture that we do not give Him enough respect.. enough reverence... we view Him as if He is more of a genie in a bottle than the creator of all things.. we look more to Him for what He will do for us on a personal level than what He will do for the world... we keep looking at our own world yet our true purpose is a kingdom purpose... not as much a personal purpose...

david got afraid of the Lord... he left the ark where it was pretty much.. .LOL... how very like us.. when we get scared.. we realize who God really is.. His Awesomeness.. His Power.. His Majesty... then we get scared and want to run from Him.. and really that is the whole reason we should be running toward Him.. because He alone is worthy to be worshipped and praised and magnified and adored and honored.... only God is worthy to be a god to us.... keep God first and everything else will fall into place...

God is REALLY SERIOUS about teaching me to obey Him and trust Him!!

I have been getting my nails done for a really long time... honestly... like 15-20years... most nail shops are owned by asians... and there are usually idols.. buddahs in the shop.. and they have food and drink set before this idol... (that of course never gets consumed)... when God got serious about cleansing me and changing me... He stopped me from going to these shops with idols in them by having my hands burn like as if on fire when they tried to touch me... so I prayed about it.. and He revealed to me that it is about the idols and that I am to not be defiled.. because I could defile someone else...

so in this conversation... I laugh and say to God.. when you find me a nail shop that does not worship idols.. I will go there... and He shows me a shop... I go in and I say to the woman... I have the craziest question for you... do you have a buddah in here? she said no.. I am a christian... (asian woman) she said my name is mary.. and my husband's name is joseph... so I start laughing and tell Jesus.. oh so you got jokes now....

I go to this shop since 2008... then they sold it... to a woman that is christian but she is not good at nails... I went without nails at all for about 3 weeks... today I go to get my nails done.. at a place I went to before God sent me to the christians... and she is glad to see me.. she actually even asks me to go out with her tonight and I am very tempted.. but somehow say no.... while she is doing my nails.. (new set mind you...) I am uncomfortable about Jesus.. and I say Lord.. I promise you... if you show me who I can go to that is christian.. I promise you I will....

this afternoon.. just a few minutes ago... 2hrs after getting the nails done... I get a text from the woman that used to do my nails and moved away... telling me that she is back... she is christian... and I realize.. I should have just waited on God... but it just felt like there was no answer...

how often do I take things into my own hands because I can't see the answer that God is bringing.. even if it is right around the corner... how soon will I really learn what trusting God really is? how soon until I finally learn to be completely obedient... even when I can't see the answer... can I trust He will bring it... I am really wishing I had waited and let her put the new set on me.... I am sorry Lord... continue to forgive me and work with me as I learn to follow you....

John 15: ⁹ “I have loved you even as the Father has loved me. Remain in my love. ¹⁰ When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love. ¹¹ I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy. Yes, your joy will overflow! ¹² This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you. ¹³ There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. ¹⁴ You are my friends if you do what I command. ¹⁵ I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn’t confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told me. ¹⁶ You didn’t choose me. I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce lasting fruit, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask for, using my name. ¹⁷ This is my command: Love each other.

so again this morning God is talking to me about being obedient to Him... and He tells me that our obedience or lack of it is really based upon our love for Him... and I think about that... and I would like to say I love you even when I don't obey you... but God has chosen us special... He has loved us without ending... the least we can do in return is to be obedient to what He asks of us....

I am coming to realize that the day to day.. not spiritual things.. like being good stewards of our belongings and our people entrusted to us... those things show how much we really love God.. because us being loving to others.. that really isn't about them being loveable all the time.. it certainly isn't about us just being oh so loving on our own... it is about being more Christlike.. about allowing God to fill us with His love and let it flow out from us.. day to day... maybe we can change a world.... one person at a time...