sacrifice...

1 Peter 2:4As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by men but chosen by God and precious to him— 5you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. 6For in Scripture it says: "See, I lay a stone in Zion, a chosen and precious cornerstone, and the one who trusts in him will never be put to shame."

being a living sacrifice is not an easy task... some days we want to be just like everyone else... but it doesn't change who you are called to be... we are children of the Most High God... we are called to be more than other people...
if you look at the children of an earthly king... they are expected to act a particular way and present an image... we are children of the King of Kings and the same is expected of us... do not shame your Father by acting like you are the same as everyone else... your inheritance is more than someone else... therefore, your sacrifice is more than someone else... walk worthy of the calling upon your life... even on the days when you don't feel like it... you are a holy priesthood... you are a spiritual sacrifice... you are chosen...

hurt by the church...

Psalms 55:12 It is not an enemy who taunts me—I could bear that. It is not my foes who so arrogantly insult me—I could have hidden from them. 13 Instead, it is you—my equal,my companion and close friend. 14 What good fellowship we once enjoyed as we walked together to the house of God.

it seems that many people get hurt by the people of God and then they affect their own relationship with God due to the things others have done to them... the first thing that we need to recognize that the church is really just a gathering place for sick people... which means that you might run into some illness in others... I will be the first to admit that while I am doing the best I can to be the best I can... some days... such as yesterday... I still get disciplined from God because I am not being a good steward of my spiritual gifts or.. as He said yesterday... I was trying to take His glory as though I am something by myself... and He hurt my feelings... I didn't want to hear that I was wrong... I didn't want to swallow my pride and confess my sin before God and man...
I have been saved since I was about 5 years old... as I went through my teenage years... I did not at all act as though I was saved... through some of my adult years I did not act like I was saved... this didn't mean I was not still in relationship with God... I was... I was still reading my bible and I was still attending church and praying... but my actions did not show this... my actions looked like any other sinner out there... sometimes we forget that everyone is on a different level in God and they may not be holy and righteous... sometimes people will say they are called into the ministry and all they are trying to do is get attention for themselves... sometimes they do not even see this is what they are doing... if you had told me that I was doing this, I would have never believed you... it had to come to me straight from God himself... my ministry was blessed and growing... you would think that all was right... even today, from the fleshy side I can tell you excuses of why I acted like I did... but none of the excuses mean anything to God... so we might tell someone what they are doing is wrong, but they can't see it... maybe they don't even want to see it... and you could be right about them... but it doesn't change anything... they are not ready to do differently...

what does any of that have to do with your walk? I am absolutely certain that when I stand before God on the judgement day, He will not ask me what someone else did to me... instead He will ask me what I did to someone else... was I a positive role model? was I giving? was I encouraging? was I a servant... because in the end, that is what we are all called to do... to be a servant... I got caught up thinking I was serving man and I got mad about it... I never served man to begin with, all my service is to be done as unto God Himself... so I had to go back and confess my wrong so that things would be right between me and God... whether man ever looks at anything differently is irrelevant... it is between me and God... He is the one I answer to ultimately...

we are all sinners saved by grace... so the next time someone does you wrong, don't allow it to be a stumbling block to your walk... what if we were to die in the time between... before we go back and confess our hard heart? what someone does to me is really not between me and them, it is between them and God... what I do to someone else really is not done between me and them, it is between me and God... any money that we have spent with the right intention is treasure in heaven... and time we have spent with right intention is sowing a seed in heaven... any gifts that we have used with right intention are rewards in heaven... don't allow shortcomings on earth to become and issue with you reaping in heaven...

the bible tells us that the door into heaven is narrow... we spend far too much time on people and trying to receive and far too little time on doing right IN SPITE OF what others do to us... the bible also tells us that Jesus said even as ye have done so unto the least of these... ye have done so unto Me... so anything someone does to you... he has done to Jesus... and you can know that it is no longer your issue... we all need fellowship with the body of believers... screwed up as we all are... we are all just learning day by day to do the right thing... all trying to get slim enough to get through the narrow gate...

sexy....

Talk to Wisdom as to a sister. Treat Insight as your companion.They'll be with you to fend off the Temptress—that smooth-talking, honey-tongued Seductress. As I stood at the window of my house looking out through the shutters,Watching the mindless crowd stroll by, I spotted a young man without any senseArriving at the corner of the street where she lived, then turning up the path to her house.It was dusk, the evening coming on, the darkness thickening into night.Just then, a woman met him—she'd been lying in wait for him, dressed to seduce him.Brazen and brash she was, restless and roaming, never at home,Walking the streets, loitering in the mall, hanging out at every corner in town. She threw her arms around him and kissed him, boldly took his arm and said,"I've got all the makings for a feast—today I made my offerings, my vows are all paid,So now I've come to find you, hoping to catch sight of your face—and here you are!Soon she has him eating out of her hand, bewitched by her honeyed speech.Before you know it, he's trotting behind her, like a calf led to the butcher shop,Like a stag lured into ambush and then shot with an arrow,Like a bird flying into a net not knowing that its flying life is over. So, friends, listen to me, take these words of mine most seriously.Don't fool around with a woman like that; don't even stroll through her neighborhood.Countless victims come under her spell; she's the death of many a poor man.She runs a halfway house to hell, fits you out with a shroud and a coffin.

all of that is exerts from Proverbs 7...
and again God takes the bat and smacks me on the side of the head...
what is it that we think we are attracting when we dress in a sexy (seductive, provocative) manner? I think that because I tend to look sexy instead of sleazy it is okay... and it's not... and I don't even usually show any body parts that should be hidden... it is just the style of the dress or the fit of the dress... in my human mind I say that I accentuate the attributes that I have... in the spirit mind... God says why? what are you trying to accomplish... attention... that is what I am looking for... again... sometimes I am such an ugly person...
2 in a row... cleanse me Father of wrong thoughts... wrong desires... change me... wash me in the blood of the sacrifice that Christ made for me... teach me to live in freedom from all the world's desires and bondage... forgive me and help me to turn from all wrong doing... continue to point out to me anything that is not pleasing to You... help me to put You and what you want for me and from me in front of anything that I should not be... in the name of Jesus I ask it... amen...

pride...

2 Chronicles 26:16 But after Uzziah became powerful, his pride led to his downfall. He was unfaithful to the LORD his God, and entered the temple of the LORD to burn incense on the altar of incense.
2 Chronicles 32:26 Then Hezekiah repented of the pride of his heart, as did the people of Jerusalem; therefore the LORD's wrath did not come upon them during the days of Hezekiah.
Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.
Isaiah 2:11 The eyes of the arrogant man will be humbled and the pride of men brought low; the LORD alone will be exalted in that day.

yesterday I had an eye opening experience that I pray will be life changing for me. I went to a bible study that I had never been to before and through the teacher I realized that I have a big problem with pride. I call my friend and tell her what I have learned and she says are you kidding? you really didn't know? I call someone else and she tells me I have been telling you this... why can't you hear me??
and the worst part of it is that I didn't see it at all... I thought that I recognize that I am nothing without God... I know that head knowledge and heart knowledge are two different things... apparently I had all the knowledge in my head, but it didn't sink into my heart... I had been wanting people to look at me instead of the God in me... ooohhhhh... how ugly is that???
God can tell you something over and over and you still just don't accept it... He has told me for 3 years that my days of getting attention are over and I just can't seem to accept it as truth... I still fight with being the cutest thing in the building... I still fight with wanting men to look at me... you can't touch me, but I want you to want to... I want to be the smartest person in the room... I want to have the best relationship with God... nothing you have can compare with mine... what an ugly person I am sometimes....
and the bible says that pride goes before a fall... I surely don't want to fall... I want this issue rooted out right now... before it can do anymore damage than it already has... the bible says there are 7 things that God detests... and pride is one of them...
Father in the name of Jesus... cleanse me.. wash me in the blood of Christ and cleanse me from this sin of pride and being puffed up... trying to take the spotlight off of you and onto me... forgive me for this ugly and sinful unrighteousness... change me... cleanse my heart and my thoughts and actions so that all the glory and honor and praise will go only to You... I know that I can do nothing without You... in the matchless name of Jesus I ask.. amen.

Love for the Father...

I wake up this morning thinking about you. Thinking of your goodness to me. Thinking of your constant show of love to me. Thinking how you constantly shower me with goodness and gifts.

I cannot imagine feeling this way about anyone else. You are my center. The first thought in the morning and the last thought at night. You are even the center of my dreams.

I know that I can depend on you. I know that you are there for me, caring for me, protecting me, even in spite of myself.

Never will there be another love like this. The love I have for the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Joseph. I praise and worship you at all times. You are the source of my inspiration...

walking into the will of God...

Matthew 26: 36Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." 37He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. 38Then he said to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me." 39Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." 40Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. "Could you men not keep watch with me for one hour?" he asked Peter. 41"Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." 42He went away a second time and prayed, "My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done." 43When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. 44So he left them and went away once more and prayed the third time, saying the same thing.

how often do we honestly pray for the will of God, above our own will? as God is growing me up, maturing me in His spirit, I am praying for the will of God above my own desires... I don't know what it will mean... but I know that the true purpose of every person's life is to further the kingdom of God... so if what I desire does not further the kingdom of God... then I submit it back to God...
Jesus was overwhelmed with sorrow... unto the point of death... He did not desire to give His life... He wanted to live and love and grow old like each of us does... and He went back 3 times... trying to change the will of God if it were possible... but the will of the Father was not so.. the will of God had Him to be sacrificed that we might be saved... and because of Him giving His will back to God... multitudes (including me and hopefully you...) have been saved...

Father... I give you my will... I give you my desires... I give you my heartfelt love and devotion... I give you my life... use me to further the kingdom of God... no matter what that might mean for me personally... I will walk forward into the will of God despite the desires of Susan... I submit my self to You... in the name of Jesus Christ the savior... amen.

power of a mother...

2 Chronicles 22:2 Ahaziah was twenty-two years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem one year. His mother's name was Athaliah, a granddaughter of Omri. 3 He too walked in the ways of the house of Ahab, for his mother encouraged him in doing wrong. 4 He did evil in the eyes of the LORD, as the house of Ahab had done, for after his father's death they became his advisers, to his undoing.

as a mother do you realize the power that you have? his mother encouraged him in doing wrong... can you imagine such a thing?? I don't know about you, but I constantly try to teach any children to do the right thing in spite of the circumstances... in spite of what their friends are doing... in spite of what feels good... but this woman, the boy's mother... encouraged him to do wrong.... I am speechless by such a thing...
I do not pretend that I have done the right thing by my children all of their lives... I do say that I did the best I could with what I had at the time... regardless of circumstance, I kept my children in church and God is faithful and my children know who God is... whether or not they will walk the path of the Lord as an adult remains to be seen... but I fully believe that if you train up a child as he should go when he is old he will not depart from it... so I believe that even if they have rough times and think they don't need God, in the end they will return to the ways of God... as I have changed over the last few years, I see changes in them also... I see my daughter read her bible in church... my son tells me he is reading his bible and I am thankful for the changes God is making in them...
a few years ago my son was in a boy's camp and one of the boys there who was only 15 years old had gotten arrested for selling drugs... and his mother was the one that had encouraged him to do so... she had a drug problem and she needed access to drugs, but she also needed income to feed the other children in the house... I remember how horrifed I was by hearing that story... the next thing that happened to the boy was that one of the counselors of the camp, a female, was in a sexual encounter with him... he was 15... I wonder today where the boy is... how the boy is... if God has ever gotten hold of him.... he used to tell my son that he didn't know how lucky he was to have the mother he had... my son said of course he did, but surely he did not, because he had never had a mother like this boy did... my son's mother would die for him... so surely he could not understand a mother that would lead him into sin and death...

we have the choice to instill in our children right and wrong... or just wrong... we lead by example... what are you leading your child into today... righteousness or hell....

blessing or curse....

Psalms 109: 6 -20 Send the Evil One to accuse my accusing judge; dispatch Satan to prosecute him. When he's judged, let the verdict be "Guilty," and when he prays, let his prayer turn to sin. Give him a short life, and give his job to somebody else. Make orphans of his children, dress his wife in widow's weeds; Turn his children into begging street urchins, evicted from their homes—homeless. May the bank foreclose and wipe him out, and strangers, like vultures, pick him clean. May there be no one around to help him out, no one willing to give his orphans a break. Chop down his family tree so that nobody even remembers his name. But erect a memorial to the sin of his father, and make sure his mother's name is there, too—Their sins recorded forever before God, but they themselves sunk in oblivion. That's all he deserves since he was never once kind, hounded the afflicted and heartbroken to their graves. Since he loved cursing so much, let curses rain down; Since he had no taste for blessing, let blessings flee far from him. He dressed up in curses like a fine suit of clothes; he drank curses, took his baths in curses. So give him a gift—a costume of curses; he can wear curses every day of the week! That's what they'll get, those out to get me—an avalanche of just deserts from God.

sheesh.... and I thought that David was always so compassionate... he really prayed against this person whoever they were... and apparently this wasn't wrong... or was it? my understanding of the bible is we are to bless those who curse us... we are to show love to the unloveable... I think that if we dwell on negative thoughts, we become negative... if we dwell on positive thoughts, we become positive... I think we would do better to pray blessing into the lives of our enemies instead of curse... who is to say that God would not reward you with blessing since you are praying good on those who hate you...
I wonder if we were to all turn our individual thoughts from hate to love would the world change? we can say that I am only one person, what difference can I make? but if you do not begin within yourself... where will it begin? we tell our children to treat people with respect and love even if they do not receive the same back, yet are we living this out in our own lives? or are we saying do as I say, not as I do?

continue to create love in me God... I cannot love someone else unless I have love in me... fill me with Your love so I can overflow onto others... I may only be one woman... but I am one woman... and one is more than none.... thank you Father for your constant show of love to me in spite of the ugly within me... teach me to pray blessing into the lives of others at all times... amen.

compromise...

2 corinthians 6:14 Don't become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That's not partnership; that's war. Is light best friends with dark? Does Christ go strolling with the Devil? Do trust and mistrust hold hands? Who would think of setting up pagan idols in God's holy Temple? But that is exactly what we are, each of us a temple in whom God lives. God himself put it this way: "I'll live in them, move into them; I'll be their God and they'll be my people. So leave the corruption and compromise; leave it for good," says God. "Don't link up with those who will pollute you. I want you all for myself. I'll be a Father to you; you'll be sons and daughters to me." The Word of the Master, God.

deciding what is judging someone and not judging them, but recognizing sin instead, is hard to do. I think I tend to be judgemental. I think I see things in black or white. either you are right, or you are wrong. according to the above scripture, the word of God agrees with me.
how often do we try to compromise the word of God or the idea of what is or is not sin.... God gave us 10 rules to live by... I imagine if we live those out to the fullest, we would not be in sin... yet none of us seems to have the ability to be sinless... if we are not sinning with our body, then we sin with our thoughts...
the only person's actions I can control are mine.... my desire is to be like Christ.... if I strive to be sinless, to the best of my known ability... I am believing God will carry me the rest of the way... I think that my walk is important because someone who does not know God will look at me and think if I say I am a Christian, then I should look like one... you know that whole... if it looks like a duck, it is a duck... so if I look like the world... maybe people see me as the world... but if I look like Christ.. people will see Christ through me... I choose not to compromise...

change me o God. show me my weaknesses. show me all things within me that are displeasing unto You. my desire is to be pleasing to You, no one else. I love you Father. I lift Your holy Name. I praise You with all that is within me. amen.

fear of rejection...

I have 3 cats... Jerry & Larry (they are twins and that is VERY unusual in cats) and Peter (who is part bobcat and just ran in my back door and never left) last night as I am sleeping... I lay on my side and am surrounded by pillows in front and back... and Larry crawls up on the pillow in front of me and lays down and is doing the whole pawing thing (very annoying, especially while you are asleep..) and is pawing/clawing at my arms and face... he is trying to get me to wake up and pet him... I am SO not feeling it at 3am...
but the next thought that I had is... he has no fear of rejection... and that was amazing to me... I think I spend much of my time in fear of rejection... I don't say half of the things I am supposed to say or do half of the things I am supposed to do because of fear of rejection... I would rather pretend I am hard hearted and just act like I ain't thinking bout you... I ain't wanting to be near you... but most would die if they knew how far from the truth that really is...
how often do we reject our Lord? how often do we go our own way and settle for less than His best for us? seems as though I did that for years... that is surely what got me to this fearful place I imagine... afraid of people... Jesus was rejected also... by everyone.. many continue to reject Him yet today... how many times has God tried to wake us up to talk or to pray or to spend time alone with Him and we tell Him we are too tired... can you imagine the gall of us? actually telling God... creator of all... that we are too tired to spend time with Him... yet we all have done it... I pray that God will change me... that He will grow me to the place where I never allow anyone to feel that I have rejected them... that I am a safe place for anyone who is in need of love... in Jesus name I ask it... amen...
John 12:47 "If anyone hears what I am saying and doesn't take it seriously, I don't reject him. I didn't come to reject the world; I came to save the world. But you need to know that whoever puts me off, refusing to take in what I'm saying, is willfully choosing rejection. The Word, the Word-made-flesh that I have spoken and that I am, that Word and no other is the last word. I'm not making any of this up on my own. The Father who sent me gave me orders, told me what to say and how to say it. And I know exactly what his command produces: real and eternal life. That's all I have to say. What the Father told me, I tell you."

darkness...

Exodus 20: 20 Moses said to the people, "Do not be afraid. God has come to test you, so that the fear of God will be with you to keep you from sinning." 21 The people remained at a distance, while Moses approached the thick darkness where God was.

I think we tend to think of darkness as a negative thing... but sure enough in this scripture... God is in the darkness... often we think we are alone in the dark... but apparently... God is in the thick darkness... it is hard to hold on in darkness.... I don't really do well in the dark... I would rather have the sun beating down on me at 100+ degrees than to be in the dark... but maybe there is reason for the dark... maybe there is a lesson to be learned there...

open my eyes Father... give me night vision....

what do you really want...

1 Kings 3:5 That night, there in Gibeon, God appeared to Solomon in a dream: God said, "What can I give you? Ask." 6 Solomon said, "You were extravagantly generous in love with David my father, and he lived faithfully in your presence, his relationships were just and his heart right. And you have persisted in this great and generous love by giving him—and this very day!—a son to sit on his throne. 7 -8 "And now here I am: God, my God, you have made me, your servant, ruler of the kingdom in place of David my father. I'm too young for this, a mere child! I don't know the ropes, hardly know the 'ins' and 'outs' of this job. And here I am, set down in the middle of the people you've chosen, a great people—far too many to ever count. 9 "Here's what I want: Give me a God-listening heart so I can lead your people well, discerning the difference between good and evil. For who on their own is capable of leading your glorious people?" 10 -14 God, the Master, was delighted with Solomon's response. And God said to him, "Because you have asked for this and haven't grasped after a long life, or riches, or the doom of your enemies, but you have asked for the ability to lead and govern well, I'll give you what you've asked for—I'm giving you a wise and mature heart. There's never been one like you before; and there'll be no one after. As a bonus, I'm giving you both the wealth and glory you didn't ask for—there's not a king anywhere who will come up to your mark. And if you stay on course, keeping your eye on the life-map and the God-signs as your father David did, I'll also give you a long life."

can you imagine God coming to you and asking what do you want from Him? can you imagine what your answer would be? you know, as suzie saint, I would like to say that I would ask for something like amazing faith... or abundant joy... or wisdom... or knowledge... and in past days... I would have been the one to ask for the wealth or something else that I wanted... I am here before you and I can tell you that some people who mean very much to me have life threatening illnesses... and so when given the opportunity to go before God and ask Him for something... I ask for their healing... I ask for their bodies to be restored... I ask for the pain to be taken from them... I ask for all signs of destruction to be restored to youth and vigor... God provides all that I need on a daily basis... I have want or need of nothing because God gives me everything I need... my desire is for healing of the people whom I love...
and I know that He can and will do so.... here is the scriptural proof....
Job 42: 12 The LORD blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the first. He had fourteen thousand sheep, six thousand camels, a thousand yoke of oxen and a thousand donkeys. 13 And he also had seven sons and three daughters. 14 The first daughter he named Jemimah, the second Keziah and the third Keren-Happuch. 15 Nowhere in all the land were there found women as beautiful as Job's daughters, and their father granted them an inheritance along with their brothers. 16 After this, Job lived a hundred and forty years; he saw his children and their children to the fourth generation. 17 And so he died, old and full of years.

living sacrifice..

Romans 12:1Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.
1 Peter 2: 4As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by men but chosen by God and precious to him— 5you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.

what would you call a living sacrifice? I would think it would be someone who would be willing to put aside their own thoughts and desires for someone else... when we say we love someone... do we love them for what we can do for them, or what they can do for us? I would say in the past that I have only said I loved people that I wanted something from... that is no longer the case... somehow God has changed love within me and I am willing to give and to not receive... granted, somedays the flesh rises up within me and I want to hear or see something back... but before long I hear the voice of God say unto me... this is not about you... it never was....
have you ever said to someone... I love you enough to die for you...
I had a man say that about me once... actually twice... once was a regular man... and if it came to death, it is like most of us... to protect ourselves...
another time... the Son of Man said it and walked it out... although He struggled in the garden of Gethsemene about walking into it, He literally died and rose again that we might live...

are we willing to die to self that Christ might live within us? are we willing to be the vessel of love that God desires us to be? are we honestly willing to say "Yes Lord, Use Me..."
Father, I ask you to daily continue to cleanse me of myself... I give myself to You to be used to Your purpose and Your glory... I give myself as a living sacrifice, whatever that may entail. Use me... In the name of Jesus Christ the Savior I say these things... amen. amen. amen.

the gift of a child...

I have been working with the kids in my church for the past 4-5 years... I have never had a more rewarding experience in church in all my life... I also worked with the kids as a teenager in the church I grew up in...
this past sunday, one of the kids I have taught since he was 3 (he is now 5) was baptized... after the baptism service he comes to me and tells me he needs me to meet his family... I smile that he would want me to meet his family... there are 3 pews full of them... and he takes me through the three pews one by one to each person and introduces me to each person and says to them... this is miss sue... she is my children's church teacher... and she is my friend... (probably 30 people...)
my heart was truly blessed by this child on sunday... but not only this sunday... every sunday... and not only this child... all of these kids... they all run to me when they see me... they hug me and tell me they love me... and they mean it... kids accept you as you are... they may not like everything you say or do... but they love you anyways...
at my church the spirit of God resides heavily in the chapel service where the kids are preached to.. I do not believe it has anything to do with preaching or music or any man made idea... the spirit of God resides in the heart of a child and where children are... God is...
many times we feel like no one loves us... or we will never be loved or whatever the issue is with us as a people and our need for love... but I promise you... involve yourself in a children's ministry... you will never be the same and you will find true love....
find a way to be a blessing to a child today...

the path of God...

Psalms 86: 11 Teach me Your way, O LORD; I will walk in Your truth; Unite my heart to fear Your name. 12 I will praise You, O Lord my God, with all my heart, And I will glorify Your name forevermore.13 For great is Your mercy toward me, And You have delivered my soul from the depths of Sheol.

How many of us are truly walking in the path God has chosen for our lives? I know that in the past I have rarely walked in it... God's path is scary... it is embarrassing sometimes... what I mean by that is that He will have us do crazy and embarrassing things... like just walk up to someone and say something... or even if it is just to walk in faith... we don't like to look crazy... we like to look like everyone else... yet the bible tells us that we are to be set apart and separated from the world... but separated and set apart is hard sometimes... it is lonely... it is scary...
so how often have you walked up to someone and said what God told you to say? how often have you walked up to someone and done what God told you to do? even if it is just to hug a stranger... or say may the peace of God walk with you... how often are we really obedient to what God tells us to do?

I can tell you in honesty that I walk in the path of God to the best of my ability now, even though I often look crazy... I have always had the ability to know what is going to happen... even as a child... but I never really understood exactly what this meant in the kingdom of God... in the flesh I thought I was just outstandingly smart... and I will also admit that I have pimped my gifts... people have asked me questions and I would answer and they would use the answers to bet on things and win money... I have this odd gift.. I don't know what someone would call it, but I draw people to me... and I have used that gift to get what I wanted sometimes... I have used the gift of bible knowledge to get people to see things my way because I can give you scripture for almost any given situation... but now... living in the will of God fully... I find that being able to know what will happen is prophecy... (what a scary word... denied that for a long time...) I still don't know what the gift of drawing people in is called, but I know that it is to be used to bring people to Christ... I know that the bible knowledge is to be used to get people to see the will of God, not the will of Susan... to be able to walk upright and righteous...
Ephesians 4: 1As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. 2Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
I urge all of us... walk worthy of the calling of God upon your life... walk upright... walk in holiness... let God not be ashamed of us... I want to hear God say to me... well done my good and faithful servant....

made strong in weakness...

2 Corinthians 12:7-10Because of the extravagance of those revelations, and so I wouldn't get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan's angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then he told me, My grace is enough; it's all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness.Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.

first off, let me say I do not have a big head over revelations... nor do I think I have any right to...
but... God has given me this ENORMOUS vision and as He gives me bits and pieces of it in revelation... I often say to Him "I can't do this... I am not this big... or you have the wrong one..." and today I hear Him say to me... I know you can't do this... you never were supposed to... but I can do it through you...
none of this is about my ability or qualities or gifts or anything.... (whew... that is a load off my mind... let me tell you....) God already knew I couldn't do anything by myself so apparently the plan is... when I feel like I am bout to fall apart or breakdown... HE stands up IN me... how awesome is that?? so my next thought was... okay then... when will I ever get secure and feel confident again? and He then says.... never... this never was about you.. never will be... this is My vision, My plan... let Me get glory through using you... (notice He did NOT say me get glory FOR Him...) lololol... maybe my being unable to do this... is WHY He will get all the glory... because I surely don't look like much in the physical form... surely not what is expected.... that's for sure... I honestly thank God today for His spirit within me... leading me and guiding me and obviously... changing me... directing my paths...

I praise you Father God... I give you all the glory and honor due your holy name... I magnify you... I worship you... I love you, adore you, I bow down before you...

what is your future...

Jeremiah 29:11For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

as long as you are a child of God, saved by the blood of Jesus, walking in righteousness, then the promises of the bible are true for you... but I believe that God gives each of us specific promises for our lives... sometimes it will feel as though we read the bible and something in your spirit moves... or the words may seem to stand out to you... in my own experience, when that happens God is speaking to me... personally... telling a promise to me... usually when He does this He will also give more scripture saying the same thing... preachers preaching the same thing... dreams.. and He will speak... until whatever was said is secure within my spirit and I know it is for me...

what has God promised you for your future? your bible holds answers for you... if your spirit is in tune with the spirit of God... He will speak life into you....

life from death...

Ezekiel 37:10 So I prophesied, just as he commanded me. The breath entered them and they came alive! They stood up on their feet, a huge army.
11 Then God said to me, "Son of man, these bones are the whole house of Israel. Listen to what they're saying: 'Our bones are dried up, our hope is gone, there's nothing left of us.'
12-14 "Therefore, prophesy. Tell them, 'God, the Master, says: I'll dig up your graves and bring you out alive—O my people! Then I'll take you straight to the land of Israel. When I dig up graves and bring you out as my people, you'll realize that I am God. I'll breathe my life into you and you'll live. Then I'll lead you straight back to your land and you'll realize that I am God. I've said it and I'll do it. God's Decree.'"

I believe God wants to breathe life back into us... sometimes the weight of the world gets so heavy.. things don't go the way we think they should... people leave us when we have done no wrong... we don't understand why things happen when our thought is to just do right by God... and the weight of feeling unloved and unloveable gets too heavy... and we are dead... whether it be spiritual death or emotional death... we just feel dead...
throughout the bible you hear God repeat the phrase "then my people will know I am God and give me honor and give me praise"... what will it take for us to recognize that He is God?? we serve a living God... yet we give him less time than any man we know... we can give praise to a dead man... or to a man of power in human terms... but what does it take for God to truly get our praise?? what does it take for us to recognize the power that the blood shed by Christ gives us? what does God have to do for us to truly SEE Him as the Living God??
give God your praise... give Him your time... sit in His presence... sit under His word... lay on your face before Him give him the recognition that He truly deserves... and He will fulfill any promise He has spoken into your spirit (operative words being HE SPOKE..) He is God enough... He is God more than enough... He is all there is.... He is Life evermore...

diversity...

hmmm... one would think I am very diverse... the color of my skin is white... my mind and body thinks in another color... my children are black... my church is historically black... my family members are black...
but it turns out... that when faced with challenges from other cultures... I get annoyed... I call to make a reservation at a hotel today and there is no one that speaks english... the woman answers the phone saying "Ola"... I immediately think uuuugggghhhhh... so I ask a question and she puts a child on the phone... the child doesn't really understand what I am saying... so I ask if there is a better time to call to speak to someone who speaks english... (wanted to say american there... see how wrong... ) and they tell me no... there is no one speaking english who works there at all...
now while we tend to feel that people should change themselves to adjust to our ways... something in my spirit is telling me that is wrong... that I have to be the one to accept differences in others... that I have to be willing to accept people as they are... how can I say I am christlike... yet get mad if I can't understand someone who was raised differently?? MANY people don't understand me... yet apparently I have the gall to judge someone else...
I honestly believe that God does not see us in color... he sees us in spirit... as long as our spirit is right with him... it matters none what color we are... what race... what nationality... we think the church should be open, yet when others come in, how accepting are we really? even others of our own race... when they dress differently or talk differently, maybe they are dirty or poor... or if they have money, then some people run toward them... what would God feel about any of that?
the bible tells us that Jesus was nothing to look at... so would we have shunned him because his hair is long, or he hangs with the thieves and murderers and prostitutes? what if he sagged his pants... and had braids... what if he hung out in the club... what if him and his friends appear as though they hustle... and they hang out with the girls from the club... or he was poor or he was dirty... what would our response to him be? I look within myself and I don't like what I see...
Father... cleanse me of all unrighteousness... create in me a clean heart and clean hands... make me accepting of all your children... regardless of what they look like, smell like, act like... make me like you... in every way... I ask this in the name of Christ Jesus.. my Lord and Saviour... amen.

got love?

1 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. 2If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. 3-7If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love. Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first," Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end.
8-10Love never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.
11When I was an infant at my mother's breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good.
12We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!
13But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.