sometimes I think about sarah and the promise God gave her of a child and how for 25 years she waited... I wonder.. did she wait like I wait? sometimes confused and unsure.. or was she always sure of what God had said... did she go through periods where she thought that she must have been wrong.. maybe it was her own mind thinking it and not really God speaking... or did she just stand strong all those years.. sure and waiting on God to decide it was the right time and move on her behalf.. open her womb and give her the child that she believed for...

I get days that I am unsure of the vision I once saw so clearly... but usually right after the confusion.. I am reminded.. and I am sure that God really did say this to me... sometimes I think that if I had someone who was agreeing with me.. that saw the same vision.. would it be easier to be sure.. or would there still be days of unsurity... and I think I would still get unsure.. I would still have good days.. and bad days... I think that is the way of faith.. I think our faith is strengthened by days going by... I think that if it were not of God that it surely would have died in my heart by now... that I would not still be holding on to this idea.. this vision.. this sight... this purpose...

I think that is one way that we can be very sure that something is from God and not our own desires... we cannot let it go... truth told.. this vision is not something I would have chosen on my own.. I am secure in my own life.. I don't really want all these changes that God has put in my heart... yet I know that in the long run.. lives may be changed because of His vision... so you don't have the ability to decide you don't want it... you continue on.. believing in God.. waiting on His Hand to move on your behalf.. waiting for Him to fulfill the vision.. because you know this is nothing that you can do on your own...