11 years ago yesterday.. 2001.. a man that I loved took his life... I was so devastated by this act that even to this day I have doubts that he did this to himself.. it is easier to believe that someone did it to him....

 

I am not prone to thoughts of suicide so I really don't understand it... obviously someone would feel like the world would be better off without them.. and they would be better off if they never woke up again....

 

if this would be the thinking.. then we really don't understand anything about this life... who do you know that can say that are not connected to anyone at all?... I can't think of anyone... there may be people like me.. who don't have a lot of intimate relationships.. yet surely someone would still be lost without every single person that was born...

 

in Jay's case.. while I could live without him.. although I was truly crushed at the time... his kids really need him.. even now.. after all this time.. and my own son was deeply affected by his death... he still has not really overcome the loss either... just think if he had lived and he used his life to the good.. how many lives could have been changed and made better...

 

he was only 28 at the time... all of that life left to live...

so I would say to anyone who is deep in depression... who thinks they are of no value at all... I would say that you are of value... maybe there are things that you should have done differently.. that is the truth of any of us... but today is a great day to change some of your mistakes and use them to influence others in a positive direction....

 

somewhere.. someone needs you.. even if you don't realize it... and even if you don't know it.. someone loves you... deeply...