Wednesday, October 24, 2012

1 samuel 15: 9 Saul and his men spared Agag’s life and kept the best of the sheep and goats, the cattle, the fat calves, and the lambs—everything, in fact, that appealed to them. They destroyed only what was worthless or of poor quality. 10 Then the Lord said to Samuel, 11 “I am sorry that I ever made Saul king, for he has not been loyal to me and has refused to obey my command.” Samuel was so deeply moved when he heard this that he cried out to the Lord all night. 12 Early the next morning Samuel went to find Saul. Someone told him, “Saul went to the town of Carmel to set up a monument to himself; then he went on to Gilgal.”
22 But Samuel replied, “What is more pleasing to the Lord: your burnt offerings and sacrifices or your obedience to his voice? Listen! Obedience is better than sacrifice, and submission is better than offering the fat of rams. 23 Rebellion is as sinful as witchcraft, and stubbornness as bad as worshiping idols. So because you have rejected the command of the Lord, he has rejected you as king.” 30 Then Saul pleaded again, “I know I have sinned. But please, at least honor me before the elders of my people and before Israel by coming back with me so that I may worship the Lord your God.”
35 Samuel never went to meet with Saul again, but he mourned constantly for him. And the Lord was sorry he had ever made Saul king of Israel.

this story is so tragic to me.. saul... decided to go against what God said.. slightly.... slightly obedient.. slightly disobedient... he was supposed to kill everything at all of the amalekites.. women children babies livestock.. everything... he kept the best of the livestock.. then states his intention is to sacrifice it to God... and he saved the king too.. (which samuel himself killed at the end of it..) I never before realized that saul had went to carmel to set up a monument to himself!! that surely wasn't good...
how often are we partially obedient.. only to the place where it is too uncomfortable.. I have to admit that I am guilty....
how often do we set up monuments to ourselves.. even if not out loud.. in our own mind... thinking of all we do for others and how much we give of ourselves... how hard we work.. how hard we try to live like Christ.. isn't all this supposed to be a monument to Christ.. yet here we are.. thinking of all it cost us....

saul acknowledges his sin.. repents.. confesses.. tries to make it right... still he is rejected by God.. samuel never meets with him again... saul did not lose his position at that time.. even though david was annointed as king shortly afterward.. saul stayed king until his death which was obviously some years later... yet he lost his position with God.. he lost his mind.. he lost his relationships....
I pray in the name of Jesus that no rebellion or disobedience I ever do causes God to truly leave me... the bible says He will not ever leave us nor forsake us.. yet it happens to saul... I don't understand it... it isn't for me to understand I guess.. but it should scare me enough to make me cautious about my own actions of rebellion or disobedience... to imagine God was sorry He chose me would be horrible...

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