this is all thoughts.. no scripture attached because i think the scripture each of us would attach would be different...

we all have something that throughout our lives God has been trying to work on us in... change to a degree... I believe whatever it is.. it is also usually a gift.. so that if used properly.. it will bring glory to God.. and if used improperly.. it will either bring glory to self or bring downfall.. depending on how God decides to use it...

when I was in the first grade I wrote big.. and the teacher punished me until I wrote very teeny tiny small.. surely not her intention.. she just wanted me to write smaller and I.. true to form... took it to the extreme... my outspoken mind has been the thing that God has really been trying to change.. but is it really the mouth... or is the true root of it the rebelliousness... because.. just like the teeny tiny writing... I tend to say everything or nothing... and really God wants me to bring this into submission to Him... and stop being rebellious with it... there is a scripture in samuel that says that rebelliousness is like witchcraft... I have never really understood how it is like witchcraft.. but I know that God absolutely hates rebelliousness... this was His greatest issue with the Israelites.. they would come to Him and submit and then go right back to their own ways... I have this same issue apparently...

I cannot pretend I have the answers.. I am just realizing what the trouble is...
I find that God teaches us much of the same lessons over and over just in more depth... like with this thing about my mouth and speaking only what is necessary or positive or encouraging.. I was fasting one day a week from the mouth over a year ago.. and I realized just how much unnecessary comments we really make... yet here I am again.. being reminded from God that I say alot of things that don't need said and sometimes things that do need said I stay silent about...

I remember as far back as my childhood I was being taught about speaking unnecessary things... yet here I am.. all these years later.. hearing it again... much of the dissention in my life has been caused by things I should not have said...

will I ever get it right?? idk.. but thankfully God has the patience enough to continue teaching me and changing me... by the time He is done I will surely wonder who I really am...